A Small Complaint

[This is the e-mail I would have sent if I truly lacked social filters at work. This is not to anyone I work with, rather it is to someone who works on my floor.]

Dear Sir;

Although I appreciate that you are blinded by my amazing ability to multi-task, work overtime, and do any number of other mind-blowing tasks, I would like to remind you that no matter * how * much you would like me to set up your office, that is nowhere near within the scope of my responsibilities.

You may remember when we discussed this about a month ago, I directed you to your Group Admin (who is NOT me, despite my mind-boggling-ly hyphenated title). Since you left and have returned, your requests are still not within the scope of my professional duties.

Furthermore, calling my office first (from two doors down) and then appearing in my doorway five seconds later in order to chastise me for not doing someone else's job was not appreciated. Bless my co-worker's heart who told you where to go to get what you need accomplished. Yet again. She also remembered telling you the last time that I am not only not part of your group, but part of an entirely separate group. Our physical proximity, charming as it may be, does not designate me as your personal go-to person. I do that for my team, and that's more than enough, thanks.

I also do not appreciate the tone of voice which you use when addressing me. I understand that my vibrant personality and the youthful exuberance that I exude may give off the impression that I lack direction and tasks. I assure you that this is not the case. I can also assure you, that despite the fact that I quite possibly am the youngest person on this floor, I deserve to be treated with the same respect you show anyone else. I am not your daughter and I do not work for you. If my manager can be polite and friendly to me, someone as low-ranking and seemingly temporary as yourself can manage to behave similarly.

Also, if I was in charge of setting up your office, based on your attitude, I would make sure it took a long time, was a mess of inconveniences (for you) and any phone that you eventually got would give you testicular cancer.

Best Regards,

Jasmin the Great