Singing Andrew's Praises

If you were jealous that I married a tall, dark, and handsome man, it gets even better.

Yesterday, he fixed something around the house. That's right, ladies. He fixed the broken light switch in the closet. By the way, the switch being broken caused a relatively tragic fashion disaster, where my slacks, blouse, and sweater (all visible) did not even come remotely close to matching each other.

He also went to the bead shop where CrackedOutLesbian works, because I was scared of a repeat of the last trip.

Time Lapse Montage Scene

It's a Friday night. We're going to BJ's with the Hopf crowd. I need to exchange 22 gauge headpins for 24 gauge headpins, because they are superior and less expensive. This should take maybe 10 minutes, tops.

I walk in, and nobody is there. Now, I could:

(A) Take what I need, and leave, undetected.
(B) Take everything, because I am a klepto.
(C) Do my "Helloooooo?" to the back, hoping that the store was not inadvertantly left empty and there is actually an employee back there.

Thinking that choosing (C) was the wise idea, I did so, and out comes COL. I didn't know that she was crazy by looking at her, but oh, was I in for a treat. And by treat, I mean 45 minutes of having my ears bent by this escaped mental patient.

I said a quick prayer to any God or Goddess who would help me, I prayed for a phone call from Andrew, asking me why I'm so late. My prayers were answered, the phone rang, and I said, very obviously, "Oh, dinner is ready. And getting cold. I will be RIGHT THERE."

I move towards the door, but her tongue is too quick, and I am caught with a dilemma: Do I just leave and let her keep talking, and be totally rude, or do I hope that a natural end comes?

Because there are only a few worthwhile bead places in the area, I chose the latter so that I wouldn't be blacklisted from the bead shop nearest my home. Fortunately, Andrew's spider senses signaled him that I had been trapped by COL, so he called me again, to ask if I was near home yet.

This was my escape, she stopped speaking when my phone range, and I answered it, said, "I'm leaving RIGHT NOW," and waved as I walked out the door, still on the phone. My ears were ringing for a good part of the night. I haven't been able to go in since, but they have the best price on the headpins I like, it's a slight problem.

So, I left the package with how many packages I needed, and asked Andrew to face the bead shop. He emerged victorious and unscathed. It's not like I don't like lesbians, I went to a women's college for pete's sake! This one needed to be heavily medicated, is all.

The next story is going to be about TheCarGuy, who acosted us in the parking lot after my Saturday night class.

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