Tuesday, December 27, 2005

New Hair!

That's right, I've been more or less a recluse for the last week. Last Saturday, I decided to cut my hair and donate about a foot of hair (about 10" braided) to Locks of Love. I've talked about doing it since... forever, but finally mustered up the courage to go to the hairdresser and get it done.

I love my hairdresser, especially since I've gotten married. Now that I'm an "adult" (it's cultural), she actually does what I ask her to, instead of what my mother thinks I should do.

So I show up, hair braided, hair ties securing the braid at both ends (because I am prepared), and I tell her what I want to do. As she is cutting- about halfway done cutting my braid off, something in my stomach screams, "Nooooooooooo!"

"Oh well, too late to go back," I think as she hands me my braid.

Ick. Hair is okay when it's on your head, but I find it really gross otherwise. I have no such qualms about hair from other critters, I'm just grossed out by detached human hair.

I bag it, and we commence with the giving-me-a-cute-haircut process. It was great, she blow-dried my hair straight (which makes it "flippy", a la my nieces and nephew), and I went over to my parent's house to pick up mom to do... whatever it was we were doing that day.

I proudly brandish my braid-in-a-bag, and my mother (not missing a beat) says, "You think that's cool? Wait 'til you see this!"

She comes out with a braid. From when I was really little. I know parents do this, but EW! I guess loving my gross, no-longer-attached-to-my-head hair is something only my parents would do.

Pics to be posted once we download the pics off of the camera.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Possession

The boyfriend sweater bit got me to thinking about possession. I'm all crazy when it comes to some things.

Some things you give up because you don't want them anymore. It's okay if you never see these things- say, like, a dress,- but if you see someone else wearing YOUR dress (and you know there isn't another one), don't you feel like walking up, ripping back your thing (a dress in this case) and saying, "This is MINE."

Maybe not you. Maybe you're one of those magnanimous people who can give things away and detach. I'm okay giving away things that are intended for other people, like, I'll never look at something I've knitted for someone and want to snatch it back for myself.

But there are just some things that I feel that way about. It's totally crazy, because I've gotten rid of it because I didn't want it anymore, and then I get this weird, "You can't have it, it's MINE," thing.

Just some random weirdness. I am the most villainous villain, by the way. Upcoming blog posting.

The Forbidden Undercurve

I was party to a rather interesting conversation last night between Chris and Andrew about the Forbidden Undercurve. For the contingency of people who are not familiar with this term, it refers to the curve that is underneath the breast- the curve that is rarely (if ever) seen, and rivals the nipple as far as forbiddenness is concerned.

So I reach out to whomever happens to stumble across my blog. Forbidden Undercurve- hotter than the rest of the boob? You decide.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Please, can I have the pleasure of wiping for you as well?

I'm on a bunch of e-mail lists for various yarn stores across the country. So when an e-mail from one of the locals popped up, I took a look. To protect the stupid, I'm not posting the name of the yarn store (but will gladly share it if asked over e-mail), but within the text of their announcements/advertisement was the following:

"If you're stuck on your holiday project, we'll help you over the hurdle. If you're not stuck, but just tired of knitting, let us knit a few rows for you to give you a break."

OMFFSM! (Oh My Flipping Flying Spaghetti Monster) I think these poor fools have NO idea what they're in for. All of their clueless, trendy knitters showing up in hopes of getting their projects knitted FOR them!

I don't mind people who want help, but people who expect me to do their knitting for them usually find me a bit unpleasant. I don't mind when people take credit for their own work that I've helped with, but I do mind- very much- when people want to hand me their knitting to do an "expert" job, and then want to take credit for themselves. Homie don't play that, yo.

The sick thing is that we're going to get complaints that we aren't offering the same, "Please, we'll do the knitting FOR you," policy. Do these crazy people not have enough going on in their own knitterly lives that they're itching to help finish projects for the poor planners who frequent their establishment?

Nevermind the fact that people's gauge is so very different that this nice "offer" may make the project look even worse. "See this section? The one without mistakes, that's all even? A PROFESSIONAL did that." Nice. At least if it's consistant, it's easier to cover up.

That's why I start any holiday knitting in May. So that I don't have this last minute holiday panic. Maybe I can teach a class on time management...

-Santa's meanest elf

Friday, December 16, 2005

Grace and I can be fat together

So, Grace blogged about how she felt like Rosie O'Donnell because she gets winded on her second lap. I get winded on my FIRST lap. I am not a runner.

The only time I could be considered even somewhat athletic was high school, when I was in marching band. I've never, ever been a runner, though. I'll walk at a brisk pace, but I do NOT run.

I enjoy wrestling, but that's fairly stationary and based on strength, wiles, and in my case, cheating at all costs. I'll gladly take on someone twice my size- and win. (Wrestling was also a pick-up method I used in high school. Ask David, Chris, and Zak. They'll all attest to it.)

I was on the swim team one year. I liked the workout aspect, but I never liked the competitive part, or the crazed coach (who was the reason I quit two weeks before the end of the season). I just liked swimming and being buff.

There really isn't any point to this post, just to point out that just because you're not much for running doesn't mean you're fat, Grace.

'Tis the season of the eternal question: To Knit or Not To Knit?

I'm a good knitter. I'm not going to be all braggy and say I'm the best. I'm not. There are techniques I haven't done because of lack of interest and time. There are techniques that I love (CABLES!), and things I knit to keep my sanity (socks).

It's the time of year when everyone in my circle of acquaintances asks if I'm knitting for everyone. The answer is NO. I am knitting for no one this year. If you don't count Mom's six-inch red square, at her request. But she's my mother, who gave birth to me and that counts for something. Even if she was only in labor with me for 45 minutes. (Anyone who takes more than an hour to be born is a bad child. Ha!)

There are people who feel obligated to knit for everyone. I tried that one year. I got two gifts in and decided that other gifts would be more appreciated, and wouldn't give me tendinitis. What a deal! For the cost of the yarn for each project, I could give them something that was thoughtful, and not the fruit of my needles. And not agonize over whether they would ever wear it. I think I was 16 the year I figured that out.

Knitters appreciate handknit gifts. If you're handing out lace shawls, put me at the top of your list. I like Zephyr (silk/wool blend), and I'll even buy the yarn. You bet I'm not knitting one of those. Lace like that hurts my eyes. But I LOVE to wear it, and it looks good on me. Other than that, I appreciate the beauty of handknit stuff. On other people, because it's like giving the Ice Cream Man a tub of vanilla ice cream. It's not exciting, and it's a little redundant.

I feel you, LovingHands. You want to clothe the world in your love. But if you knit for everyone, chances are, your intentions are better than your handwork. Most of your recipients won't gush over your pieces, and you'll be angry that they don't appreciate you. Sad but true.

My feelings on the matter? Make them BEG for knitted gifts. That's right. You wait, you don't knit for your friend/girlfriend/boyfriend/fiancee/friend with benefits until they BEG for it. Like so:

"Jasmin, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease make me some socks. I love handknit socks. I would do ANYTHING for a pair of your socks."

Let's face it, according to the laws of supply and demand, the more of your stuff that is in circulation, the less people will want it. Most people don't want it anyway. Not your teenaged niece- especially not your teenaged nephew, and FSM forbid you knit for you Significant Other. You know why boyfriend sweaters are the kiss of death? Because they see a sweater you made for yourself, since they're not the sweater-wearing type. They see YOUR sweater in their drawer, and girl, you might as well have moved in all your stuff that day. He sees you forcing commitment into his dresser drawers and he wants NO part in that. There you are, dumped, wanting YOUR sweater back. But it's not your sweater anymore, because you GAVE it away.

See? All this pain, when you could have given him an Xbox game, or something else x-rated instead. The moral of this post? Make them beg for that handknit love goodness.

-Santa's meanest elf.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

I love WEBS.

It's really awesome when you order something and it shows up promptly. This may seem obvious to you, but when you are ordering something like yarn from Mom & Pop yarn stores, the time when you order and the time when you actually receive the item can be two entirely different things.

For example, a year and a half ago, I ordered some Regia from an online store- a specific color pattern for a specific task. After two weeks of waiting (and they, ahem, had charged my credit card already), I sent an e-mail saying "Hey, where's my stuff?"

I got an e-mail back saying that they did NOT have ANY Regia in stock, but would be happy to pick something "close" out for me. You're joking, right? I work in a yarn store. Although all of Regia's colors are not unique, THIS color was. Believe me, I looked far and wide.

I responded curtly that if they had ZERO Regia in stock, they shouldn't have charged my credit card, and should have alerted me as soon as they saw the order, not, like whenever I called. Jeez.

So, back to WEBS. Cynthia ordered some GORGEOUS green Malbrigo, and I ordered some more Noro so that I can finish my Einstein. Not being Einstein-y myself, I didn't think about the fact that if I lengthened the coat from the length that I normally knit for myself, I would need more yarn.

So picture me, zipping along, knitting my Einstein, getting to ball #6 of 10, and realizing "Oh. I'm going to need more yarn. A LOT more yarn." So we placed the order, and yesterday, BAM! it's here. It's been a few days between, but it was before my "Where the hell is my yarn?" length of time. (For those of you who need specifics, this is about two weeks.) I've ordered from them before, and I've had good service before. They were a little rude in person at Stitches last year, but there was a long line and I was slow in forking over the plastic.

Speaking of Stitches, I've decided that I need to win the Secret Sound on KRTY. Or Andrew can win it. That way, I can spend with little restraint and have a wicked good time. Or, you know, not buy any yarn that I don't absolutely HAVE to have.

Speaking of yarn... I like the newest issue of Knitter's Magazine. True, it's not chock-full of stuff I love, but there are 3 or 4 things I would (and am planning to knit). Granted, some of it makes me want to yack, but overall, it's not like there isn't ONE thing I would knit, which is sad, because that's how I've felt about Interweave Knits, which used to be my favorite. I've always liked Knitter's, but it's not always a good fit for me, which Interweave WAS a few years ago. Maybe I've grown and changed, or not. Overall, Vogue Knitting seems to be the most consistent (up until the last few issues) about having a balance of too-trendy and classic stuff. Just my two cents. Like you care.

Gil Grissom is hot. And this rat-baby is named Grissom, but he's just adorable.

Monday, December 12, 2005

Wierd dreams, again, and inappropriate pictures

Last night I dreamt that I was in graduate school, getting some sort of advanced degree in English Lit. I was attending grad school at my high school and I couldn't remember my locker combination. I came home and gave birth after school.

Now, before everyone gets all excited because they think I'm prego, hold your horses. I'm not.

It was wierd because I gave birth, and then my STOMACH hurt, instead of my bits.

In other bits of offensive news, I checked my MySpace this morning and there was a message and friend request from a guy named William. I usually check their pages, and I don't add people who I don't know personally, but sometimes people I know have wierd pictures up as their little avatar thing. So I click "see my other pictures" and there are like 5 pictures of his penis. What exactly is this prince of a man seeking on MySpace? Sex with women who are willing to give it away.

Now, this definition is CLEARLY what I look for on MySpace (definitely not to reconnect with people I've lost contact with, no), but to add insult to injury, PenisPictureMan's message to me said that my smile lit up his room and he was hoping to get to know me better. He's in his 40's, which isn't a deal breaker for me (since I like older men), but is since I'm married (pesky husband) and how I'm not going to have free sex with men who post pictures of their penises on the internet.

It's one thing to sneak a picture of your boyfriend/lover/husband's bits when he's, say, washing the dishes naked and doesn't know you have the camera, but unsolicitied penis pictures are just tacky. I mean, ICK! My fault, I suppose for thinking it may be someone I know.

On this note, penises are not particularly photogenic. I mean, of all the "forbidden" parts, it's the most funny looking. Not that vaginas are much better, but they can look like flowers and stuff. According to Georgia O'Keefe.

I laughed at the inappropriate penis pics. What can I say? Genitals make me laugh.

Wednesday, December 7, 2005

Things that annoy me

1. People who say "kin-nee-garten" instead of "kindergarten".

2. People who say "pitcher" and are referring to a photo or drawing, not a baseball guy.

3. Loud chewers/ people who chew with their mouths open/ people who smack their lips in appreciation. Although I am under the impression that this is considered polite in some Asian cultures, none of the offenders has had any link to the far East (other than possibly a fetish).

There are more, but I thought I would post those for now.

Monday, November 28, 2005

A great birthday. Well, it was okay...

I've had a string of crappy birthdays. I don't really think it's my being born that was crappy, so much as having my birthday the same week as Thanksgiving. Sometimes, it's even on Thanksgiving. I know, it baffles the mind.

I could recount past birthdays that sucked, but let's stay in the now.

Memory Montage Scene: November 23rd, 2005

I get out of bed, like normal, get dressed for work, get my stuff together, Andrew sings a strange birthday song while doing a butt-dance. I think everyone should begin their day with a butt-dance.

I get to work, and everyone wishes me a happy birthday as they walk in. Woo. Proceed with normal work-day activities, including dealing with SnappyAdmin at one of the other offices. Nothing like being snapped at by the woman who invented unpleasantness on your birthday. Or any other day. Because today may be your last, you know? Some cliche philosophy for you, no charge.

My mom called me at like 8:05AM at work to sing me Happy Birthday, and Sam's call was promptly a few minutes later. AWESOME! Even better was when my father showed up at work.

Normally, my father showing up at work is a Bad Thing. But this time, he had a card for me. And in that card was MONEY! For me! I love money! (Always a good gift from my father, since he doesn't really know or like me.) It was by far, one of the best gifts I got this year. So far.

I took my lunch promptly on time. Since we were having cake at 2PM, that meant leaving a little before 1. We got out at 3PM that day. That's right, gentle audience. Jasmin drove her butt home for lunch (like she does every day), drove back to work for an hour, then drove back home. The sucky thing is, we had cake for like 45 minutes. I could have just taken the cake home at lunch, but where would the celebration be?

Let's add that the web guy called like two seconds before I was getting ready to pack up my stuff to haul my butt home, so I grab it in the empty office, with the lights off, thinking it was just another call to transfer to someone's voicemail. Oh no, it's a call for me. Somewhat important, too.

So picture this: here is your lovely heroine, chatting with the web guy (who is charming- I have no complaints with him) about the next step that needs to be taken, in a dark office, with my feet up on the desk.

My co-workers start closing up the office around me. As in, I walked down a dark hallway when I was finally done on the phone. This means, everyone left before me. Poop. Or as they say at Ikea, Püp.

No matter, I go home and play for a little while before Andrew gets home. We get our crap together, head over to Chevy's to find the Hopf crowd waiting for us. Woo! Now the REAL fun begins.

We have fun at dinner, and part of the dinner festivities were the Naked Man playing cards. These were to follow the theme of the Naked Woman playing cards that I got last year (that we proudly wore on our yellow pointy hats). The NW cards were straight out of the '80's. Oh yeah, they weren't even marginally attractive. The NM cards must have been produced by the same people, because there was a veritable plethora of mullets and unattractive men. A great gift, which we used while we waited in line for RENT to play "Go Fish" with. We ran into one of the guy's friends, lets call him... ScreamingQueen. Now, this is merely an allegation of his amazingly gayness, but I'm sorry, sistafriend- pink isn't for boys. It's just not. There's a reason you haven't had a girlfriend in years. It's because you're gay!

I like gay men. Usually, they like me. I don't like this one. I'll be polite to him, but that's all he gets from me. I thought he was hot in high school, before I had a CONVERSATION with him. Actually, it wasn't much of a conversation, so much as SQ speaking, and me trying to get in a word edgewise. Unsuccessfully. Imagine that.

It was really bad, every time someone would open their mouth to comment on something he had ASKED about, he would throw his hand up in your face ("talk to the hand" style), and speak even faster and louder. Really, people. No exaggeration necessary.

So, he decided to sit with us, since he was friends with my friends (no biggie, he didn't sit next to me and bug me). Ally grabbed the center seat behind the railing (a great choice), and we grouped in the first 2 rows around the center.

I sang. It was really fun, singing all out, and still hearing the movie loud and clear. Rumor has it that other people were singing, too, but I could hear anyone but Ally and Grace occasionally. Good times were had by all.

After that I totally pooped (püped) out and we went home, but it was freaking awesome. Thanks for a great birthday, guys!

Finished Object

Woo! I finished my pink wristers! They're AWESOME.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

VEGAS, BABY!

On Friday, I skeedadled my behind from work at 5PM sharp, having previously done a hop-spin down the hallway to express my elation in the form of interpretive dance, since in an hour and a half I was GOING TO VEGAS!

Jealous? I knew you would be.

Since I am the QUEEN of good planning, I hadn't packed anything, but I pulled the clothes that I had chosen to wear to Avenue Q. Other than that, I could have done all of my clothes for the weekend in my backpack, but Andrew had the supreme forethought to bring my Cavaliers bag and not have our backpacks stuffed to the gills. This is a good thing.

We go to the airport, get dinner at the world reknown King of Burgers, and I get a latte, since we were getting in at about 10PM, I wasn't going to waste one minute in the hotel. Hopped up on caffiene and the hopes of winning a million dollars (my goal for the weekend), we headed for the security gates.

With all honesty, I understand why we have to show up early, and practically get cavity searched everytime we fly. Because people are scared. I'm not, but whatever. I enjoy the extra time to sit and read fluff. We walk through, and begin getting out of our shoes and coats, when someone knocks over their soda, right across the walkway...where we all are walking in socked feet. I found this terribly amusing, since I hadn't squished through it, so I laughed. Apparently, airport security was less amused. They didn't punish me or anything, but I thought, This five feet here is the ONLY place you go in socked feet. Of COURSE this is where a soda gets dumped.

Bear in mind that I am in a GREAT mood. That's how I could laugh at a potentially shitty situation.

We get though security fine, wait for maybe 15 minutes, then board the plane. Oh, and the carrier- America West- overbooks EVERYTHING. Both flights, they begged people to switch flights. Not us, we're headed for VEGAS, BABY!

For the duration of the flight, the man who sat next to me- a rather good-looking nerd-type- read, moving his lips the entire time. And I may add, that his personal hygene skills were not... adequate. Every time my shoulder brushed his (which was often, because sardines have more room to wiggle about, with all that convenient oil), he would shift uncomfortably, and glance at my chest. Soak it up, buddy, I'm in a good mood.

We get to Vegas! and the cab system at the airport is freaking BRILLIANT. Efficient. Within two minutes of de-planing, we're on a cab to our hotel. With a cab driver who sounds like he's going to die of emphezema any second.

It was a short ride to the Residence Inn (our hotel, free, courtesy of our credit card miles, same as our flight), so we got out, dropped our stuff and headed out for the strip.

It would be prudent to mention that my other goal for my Vegas trip was to see a taping of CSI and become a corpse on the show, which Andrew totally crapped on. But hope springs eternal, right?

We walk to the strip. We walked all the way AROUND the back way from the Residence Inn to the Strip. OhmyfreakingGod. Such a long walk. Seriously. In the 40 years where Moses and his groupies wandered around the desert, they didn't do more walking than we did that night.

We went into Treasure Island, which is terribly tacky and full of smokers. I played a few slots, lost about $3.00 (won $.75, but blew it in the effort to win the million. Dammit!), and we moved on. We walked down as far as Bally's, but not before yours truly managed to do some serious damage to herself. That's right, I pulled my groin muscle (Andrew says it's not, but it's the leg/crotch crease, which says "groin" to me) walking the freaking strip. Sooooo much pain.

All I can think to myself is "Oh my God. I am in so much pain and we have to walk our asses ALL THE WAY BACK to the hotel." Oh, and there was no rental car for the weekend, as we had planned to walk. And now I'm in grievous pain.

Andrew sees the sign for the Monorail, so we head towards it, in hope that it will take us closer to the hotel, so I don't have to schlep my gimpy backside all that way back. I limp all the way in to find that the Monorail is the greatest invention EVER. It has a stop ACROSS THE STREET from our hotel. I couldn't have been happier.

SATURDAY

We spent most of Saturday at the Star Trek Experience, which I thought was really fun. I enjoyed being able to see a chronological timeline of the Star Trek Universe. We went on the Klingon Encounter first, which was freaking awesome.

While in line for the "ride", they had a video playing with the EASIEST Star Trek trivia EVER. So easy, in fact, that the people in line were groaning at the simplicity. Two guys show up in command uniforms (red shirts), with pips designating them both as Captains. Normally, I wouldn't make fun of them (ok, I would), but this bears more mockery than normal.

On the ride, you end up on the deck of the Enterprise, and the people on the command deck are scuttling around resolving the conflict that the ride centers around. Here are two "captains" and they're standing around like dumbasses. A distinct lack of leadership ability makes me want to confiscate their pips and reduce them both to Ensign (rank: fodder). If they're Captains, I'm a freaking Admiral. I laughed at them. Silly nerds.

After that, we were FAMISHED, so we ate at Quark's Bar (which had REALLY good food), and we drank something called a "Borg Sphere"- a fishbowl FULL of alcohol- with dry ice for dramatic effect. Intended for two, so we shared it. The two of us managed to get about halfway done with it before we both were buzzed. The Ferengi running the bar mocked us for listing so early into our drink. It was cool. Then we went on the Borg Encounter, which was still fun, but not as cool as the Klingon one. I was especially entertained, because at one point, a Borg grabs one of the guides (who was right next to me). I considered letting loose a blood-curdling scream, but thought better of it, since I was not exactly sober. Next time, I'm going through that one sober and screaming.

We hit the gift shop (which is GREAT). We played the slots there afterwards, and we [Andrew] won like $90 on a Star Wars slot machine. After that, we got ready for the show and went to The Wynn.

The theater was beautiful. And full of old people. Seriously, with walkers and stuff. I leaned over to Andrew and pointed out the demographic that was in the theater- not exactly the crowd I would expect to see at this show.

The two old ladies next to me were discussing the show, and one said to the other "Do you know what this show is about?" to which her friend replied, "No, but I heard ads for it on the radio." I had to stifle my laughter, because they had NO idea what they had signed up for.

They didn't laugh once. Oh, and at "The Money Song", where they come out into the audience, the old people didn't catch on to pass the money to the hat. Stupid old people.

After the show, we had dinner, and headed back to the hotel (we were tired).

Sunday

We had brunch at a particularly heinous Tapas place, where they served me ceviche with bad fish and tried to convince me that it's Spanish ceviche, which is different from Mexican ceviche. Bad fish is bad fish, lady. I didn't say it wasn't delicious, I said "The fish has gone off." You bet it wasn't on the bill, I ate one bite and pushed it aside.

The airport was an enormous CF. The America West self-check in kiosks were down, which meant 8 gajillion people huffing and puffing about waiting in line. I read my book.

We finally board the plane, then sit there for an extra 20 minutes. Paperwork. Hmpf. We got home safe, had dinner with the family, greeted our puppies (who missed us sooooo much), and got to bed early because we were bone-tired. And not millionares. We're going again, eventually, seeing more shows, and staying at the Residence Inn again- specifically because it's not on the strip, but has easy access to everything.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Birthday goodness

Just a note to keep everyone updated on what's going on for my birthday. We're starting 6-ish, seeing RENT, and having dinner. Not necessarily in that order. Maybe hanging out at the Shanty afterwards. We will be exchanging names for the Christmas gift exchange, for any/all interested.

Gift exchange information

If you are interested in participating in the gift exchange, show up, write your name on the slip of paper, drop it in the hat, then draw a name. You will be giving a gift ($50 price range) to the person you draw at the Christmas/Holiday party (time/date/place TBD). If you can't make it to my party, let me know and you will be included and drawn for in absentia.

I'll write about Vegas later, but for now, just the update on the "party" stuff.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Singing Andrew's Praises

If you were jealous that I married a tall, dark, and handsome man, it gets even better.

Yesterday, he fixed something around the house. That's right, ladies. He fixed the broken light switch in the closet. By the way, the switch being broken caused a relatively tragic fashion disaster, where my slacks, blouse, and sweater (all visible) did not even come remotely close to matching each other.

He also went to the bead shop where CrackedOutLesbian works, because I was scared of a repeat of the last trip.

Time Lapse Montage Scene

It's a Friday night. We're going to BJ's with the Hopf crowd. I need to exchange 22 gauge headpins for 24 gauge headpins, because they are superior and less expensive. This should take maybe 10 minutes, tops.

I walk in, and nobody is there. Now, I could:

(A) Take what I need, and leave, undetected.
(B) Take everything, because I am a klepto.
(C) Do my "Helloooooo?" to the back, hoping that the store was not inadvertantly left empty and there is actually an employee back there.

Thinking that choosing (C) was the wise idea, I did so, and out comes COL. I didn't know that she was crazy by looking at her, but oh, was I in for a treat. And by treat, I mean 45 minutes of having my ears bent by this escaped mental patient.

I said a quick prayer to any God or Goddess who would help me, I prayed for a phone call from Andrew, asking me why I'm so late. My prayers were answered, the phone rang, and I said, very obviously, "Oh, dinner is ready. And getting cold. I will be RIGHT THERE."

I move towards the door, but her tongue is too quick, and I am caught with a dilemma: Do I just leave and let her keep talking, and be totally rude, or do I hope that a natural end comes?

Because there are only a few worthwhile bead places in the area, I chose the latter so that I wouldn't be blacklisted from the bead shop nearest my home. Fortunately, Andrew's spider senses signaled him that I had been trapped by COL, so he called me again, to ask if I was near home yet.

This was my escape, she stopped speaking when my phone range, and I answered it, said, "I'm leaving RIGHT NOW," and waved as I walked out the door, still on the phone. My ears were ringing for a good part of the night. I haven't been able to go in since, but they have the best price on the headpins I like, it's a slight problem.

So, I left the package with how many packages I needed, and asked Andrew to face the bead shop. He emerged victorious and unscathed. It's not like I don't like lesbians, I went to a women's college for pete's sake! This one needed to be heavily medicated, is all.

The next story is going to be about TheCarGuy, who acosted us in the parking lot after my Saturday night class.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Stolen from The Skaren

[Name] Jasmin
[Age] 23 in 12 days
[Nickname] Snazzmin, Snuggle Nugget
[Birthday] see "[Age}"
[Born] Feet first, one hand over my head.
[Sexual Prefrence] Men. Preferably sans mustaches.
[Status] Intrinsic. Educated. Married.
[Lives] If you call what I do living, yes.
[Nationality] American. Oh, you mean CULTURAL IDENTITY. Persian.
[Height] 5'1" ish
[Weight] 121 as of Friday
[Eye Color] Brown
[Hair Color] Brownish with reddish highlights
[Virgin] No, I prefer my beverages to have some experience.
[Siblings] Sam.
[Nieces/Nephews] 8. 6 girls, 2 boys.
[Parents still together] Like "The Twits" by Roald Dahl
[Best Friend] Andrew.
[Enemy] BabyMomma (ask me later)
[First Bestfriend] Elena- her mom was blind.
[First Boyfriend/Girlfriend] David from the Hopf.
[Last Boyfriend/Girlfriend] Zak, if you don't count Andrew b/c I married him.
[Ever been in love?] Yes.
[Longest Relationship] Current, hitting 4 1/2 years in February.
[Shortest Relationship?] 2 months, David.

[Favorite Car] Batmobile.
[Favorite Place] Monterey. Or in bed.
[Favorite Number] 63 or 7. Also like 13.
[Favorite Letter] Anthing that has a check in it
[Favorite Holiday] Arbor Day.
[Favorite Sport] Drum Corps.
[Favorite age so far] 18 and 19 were pretty good.
[Favorite Drink] Single, Decaf venti 5 pumps of almond, 1 pump of raspberry, breve latte. No Foam.
[Favorite Day of the week] Saturday.
[Favorite type of music] Broadway.
[Favorite Singer] Douglas Sills, Hugh Jackman.
[Favorite Rapper] The little old lady from The Wedding Singer
[Favorite Band] Tenacious D.
[Favorite Song] "The Internet is For Porn"
[Favorite CD] Currently- Little Women
[Number of CD's owned] Lots.
[Favorite Movie] Lots. Hopefully RENT.
[Favorite TV Show] Currently, CSI.

[[Do You]]
[Smoke] Nope, SMOLDER.
[Drink] Lattes, hot chocolate, water, milk. And booze of all varieties.
[Gamble] Everytime I get in my car.
[Cheat] At cards.
[Like Guns] I like the idea of shooting at targets.
[Like Video Games] Nope.
[Own a car] Yep. Morocco Mole.
[Own a cellphone] Yes.
[Own a gun] No.
[Have a creditcard] Yes, that's how our Vegas trip was basically comped, excluding food and theater tickets.
[Do Drugs] Um, no.
[Go To School] Not any more, but I teach, so does that count?
[Wear Watches] If I got up 5 minutes earlier, or preplanned my wardrobe, yes.
[Wear Bracelets] Nope. Childhood trauma.
[Wear necklaces] When I have time to coordinate
[Wear Belts] Yes, to hold my pants up.
[Have a purse/wallet] Two wallets, many purses.
[Use flourescent lightbulbs] Um, possibly.
[Have a TV in your room] Yes, to Andrew's great chagrin.
[Have a computer in your room] I could. It's a laptop.
[Have an entertainment system in your room] TV, DVD player, tiny boombox.
[Have a DVD player in your room] See above.
[Have an origional painting in your room] You are funny. I WISH.
[Have a Picasso in your room] read above.
[Have a walk-in closet] Yeah, but I have to share it.
[Share a room] Yeah. With that wierd guy who follows me around.

[[Describe the Perfect girl/boy]]
[Eye Color] I've been drawn to blue-eyed men in the past. Andrew has brown eyes that turn green with his mood. Bring on the men, that's what I say.
[Hair Color] Used to be attracted to blonds, but I'm finding more and more that I like dark-haired men.
[Height] Andrew is too tall. I would say 5'9"-5'11"
[Weight] Fit, but not stickly.
[Nationality] Not Persian, or any other nationality that encourages misogyny.
[Wears glasses] That's hot.
[Favorite type of music] Something a little different than me, but with some overlap, preferably Broadway being the overlap.
[Favorite Sport] Drum Corps, or hockey.
[Bubbly or laid back] laid back. I can't deal with bubbly.
[Lazy or active] Active enough to push a vaccuum around the house, not so active that he's never ever around.
[Funny or serious] Sarcastic.
[Quiet or loud] Subdued enough to be my subtle, funny, other half. Or my straightman.
[Has a job] This is a must. Being unemployed and not a student is an unacceptable combination that has doomed many women into Sugar Mama relationships, which are BAD.
[Has a car] This would help. I don't like to drive, and I don't let others drive my car.
[Virgin] Doesn't bother me, I'll break him in. :)
[Likes to drive] See "[Has a car]"
[Likes to party] Preferably "likes to be social" but isn't the idiot with the lampshade on his head.
[Likes to swim] Sure.
[Likes children] This is a must for long-term.
[Likes to travel] Yes, childhood trauma from not traveling enough. [Smokes] This is a definite NO. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.
[Drinks] Occaisionally is fine with me, but not if it's a requirement to have fun .
[Artistic] [Bilingual]

Monday, November 14, 2005

FO! Socks!

Last week, Mom was up in Auburn, visiting Constance and the kidlets, so I taught her beginning knitting class on Monday, then later in the week taught Socks on Friday(6 students) and Socks on Circs (2 students) on Saturday night. And I (sort of) subbed for her "Mom-n-Me" class.

I spoke briefly with Melinda of Tess Yarns on Saturday, and we talked about Stitches (countdown to be posted when I can find one), for which I am knitting wristers/gauntlets to match the ribbon shells that I will be wearing (probably in her booth). I am SO excited!

In order to absolve myself of unfinished project guilt, I finished a pair of Koigu socks (Koigu from South Dakota) and cast on the wristers. They're in the sidebar as socks because there was no glove option and I'm not saavy enough to design my own. They're from the Purl Stitch by Sally Melville.

More later, I forgot what I was going to blog about besides the socks and classes.

Wednesday, November 9, 2005

The Netflix Conspiracy

I'm not normally a conspiracy theorist, but the last two weeks have caused me to raise a suspicious eyebrow.

Normally, the cycle goes like this:

Day 1 Watch DVD.
Day 2 Mail DVD. Usually it's received the same day, otherwise it is recieved on Day 3.
Day 3 DVD is recieved, next DVD is mailed.
Day 4 Get the next DVD at home.

The four day turnaround isn't bad. It gives us time to cycle out and have one DVD at a time to watch. Usually. The last two weeks have had nearly a full week for turnaround time. Now, four days means that you can have two sets of DVDs a week, if you remember to drop the watched ones in the mail. We all know that since there is nothing good on the El Cheapo cable on Mondays (and most other nights), it is critical to have DVDs arrive in a timely fashion.

"So where is the conspiracy?" you ask.

See, we have the standard, 3-Disc plan. We have been perfectly happy with this arrangement; it's less expensive than fancy schmancy cable. So, in order for them to really get us to spend money with them, they're trying to make us up our plan so that we never run out of commercial-free entertainment.

Ok, maybe it's not a *real* conspiracy. But it TOTALLY could be. The really stupid thing is that I work around the corner from their headquarters. If it was their headquarters/master distribution center I could totally walk in, grab my DVDs, and save them exactly $2.4 gazillion** dollars on our household ALONE.

**Amount subject to interpretation.

Tuesday, November 8, 2005

I win and you STINK!

That's right, you heard me. I am a WINNER!!!!

I listen to the local country western station when I get ready for work, and in the car on the way to work. This morning's contest was to win tickets to The Lion King, which I already had tickets for. What did callers have to do? Quote the lines following these:

"Can you feel the love tonight?
The peace the evening brings..."

Easy, right? Wrong. FIVE people miss it before I dial in, thinking "I am never going to get through." But I DID.

I totally won. That's right. I RULE at "What's the next line?". For Broadway stuff, anyway.

It's done in live time, so you could hear Andrew laughing in the background. Because I called in out of spite for all of the crappy callers who were hoping to get a "thanks for trying" prize.

Monday, November 7, 2005

Finger wedgiesFinger wedgies

I have wicked tendonitis. I know what it's from- duh- working on the website all day at work. So in addition to wearing my rigid wrist braces at night, I started wearing the fashion statement of the century, which have surprisingly worked.

Unfortunately, they are chafing the spot between my index and middle fingers. Pain!

In other news, we went to the Melting Pot for dinner Saturday night before we saw West Side Story. Diana DeGarmo SUCKS!!! She may have nearly been an American Idol, but she was the least talented person on that stage. She was also the pudgiest Maria I've ever seen, including high school performances. It's really sad that the level of talent on American Idol turns out to be so low compared to stage performers.

Just for the record, I didn't ever watch American Idol (except for the Auditions, occasionally), and I heard Ms. DeGarmo's name in my Modern Drama Lit class in college, when the back row was OBSESSED with it.

KNIT CONTENT

I finished a pair of socks this weekend, and I'm plugging through the stitch markers at a good clip. Woo!

Thursday, November 3, 2005

Stop following me around!

Thief Steals $75,000 Worth of Bull Semen

The article speaks for itself. I have to say, I sympathized with the guy who had his bull semen purloined. Could you imagine that kind of loss?

I mean, after the carpal tunnel went away from obtaining all that semen, only to turn around and find that someone has stolen all of that hard work. Now you're going to have to go through and convince all those bulls again that you loooooove them so that you can get the goods. Again.

Don't get me started on how you're going to have to explain not calling them the next day, either. And the empty promises about how you really will call this time. Not to mention how all the bulls will be following you around, staring at you amorously FOREVER. Because you ladder-jumped, of course. We all know that the Ladder Theory is great and true. *sarcasm*

Just FYI, I did the math on how much each shot of Bull Macho Gazpacho costs, and it is $1500. The same as one shot of champion dog juice.

Wednesday, November 2, 2005

It's not that I don't love you, baby.

I heard on the radio this morning that a completely unscientific radio poll determined that 79% of people who watch The West Wing want Matt Santos- played by Jimmy Smits- to be the next P.O.T.U.S. (President Of The United States). His opponent is played by Alan Alda.

First of all, in a street fight of hotness, Alan Alda kicks the crap out of Jimmy Smits. Twice on Sundays. I don't like Jimmy Smits, and the 1 1/2 dimensional character he plays isn't half as smart, witty, or attractive as Martin Sheen. I don't care if Martin Sheen is old; he's HOT. And Bartlet is a GREAT POTUS. How can a halfwit like Matt Santos- who doesn't seem to understand the function and art of politics- be an effective POTUS? Even a staunch Greenie like me would rather vote for Alan Alda, a *gasp!* Republican, than a halfwit democrat. His character may be sort of evil, but he is SMART. I'd rather have a smart and evil President than Matt "Hi, I trash hotel rooms having kinky sex with my wife and don't think the hotel will leak it to the Press" Santos. Blech.

Santos has the delightful Josh Lyman as his chief of staff, which makes me feel like I'm not being faithful to my Josh by wanting Alan Alda to win. I really shouldn't talk about West Wing, since I've been less than devoted to watching it.

It's not my fault. See, I just don't care about commercial-ridden television. With Netflix, I fast forward through the credits, and I get to watch my shows all the way through. Four episodes at a time, if I fancy it. With commentary, if I'm feeling a little saucy. Clearly, Netflix is superior to live TV. And don't start about Tivo unless you're planning to buy me one. In that case, click the "Contact Me" button and we'll arrange a drop. Wear a black trench coat and carry a violin case. Ask for "Vinnie" at Starbucks. But I digress.

I do watch live TV occasionally, and they've moved West Wing to Sundays. Which conflicts with my new love, CSI. CSI can be watched as individual, independant episodes. West Wing requires a long commitment, marathon-like plotlines, and massive character development. So in this analogy, West Wing is marriage (or a relationship with history), and CSI is a one-night stand. I'm sorry, West Wing, but I've missed at least two seasons between where the DVDs end and you begin. I don't know who half of the people are anymore. What happened to running the U.S. Government? Why is the staff of the whole West Wing running around instead of trading quips in the White House with Bartlet?

Ah, but CSI... I can watch re-runs on Sunday nights, and not be horribly confused. It's a formulaic show: body is found, CSI's show up, Grissom makes a bad joke, and the rest of the episode solving the crime. If you're lucky, Nick Stokes will take off his shirt. But only if you're good. Nobody takes off their shirt on West Wing unless they've been shot.

So, CSI will be my mistress until Season 5 of West Wing is out on DVD (December). But for the time being, I'm with CSI and (as of tomorrow) Law & Order SVU- season 2.

KNIT CONTENT

I knitted a pink/purple/white Baby Albert for Jill. Pictures to be posted once I get the buttons on.

Saturday, October 29, 2005

I am on FIRE!

I finished another pair of socks last night; woo! I'm also finishing another pair of Andrew's South Dakota socks, Regia Ringel Color #5072. It's pretty old, so no link for the color.

Andrew finished untangling the mess that Elphie made of my next pair of Regia Jubillee sock yarn, so those will go on the needles tonight. I feel very accomplished. I'm not quite through all of the Jubliee that I bought, but at this rate, I will be soon! (Remember, faithful readers, that I bought every color in the line.)

In other news

Last week we had to put Macy to sleep. She was very old, and when Sam woke up Thursday morning, he found her having difficulty breathing and walking. Mom decided after taking her to the vet that Macy wouldn't linger, and Mom preferred that she pass naturally at home with those who loved her. When I arrived after work, at 5:15, Macy was struggling and unhappy, so we elected to put her to sleep to alleviate her suffering. Macy was almost four years old, the oldest rat we've ever had.

Macy's Story

We adopted Macy on August 6th, 2004 from The Silicon Valley Humane Society. We had gone earlier in the week to meet a dog, and Mom saw Macy in her little cage. Finally, on Friday, Mom insisted that I go back, meet, and adopt Macy if she was social and friendly.

She totally was. She was snuggly, and cute, and super affectionate, from the beginning. I was against adopting such an old rat (she was roughly 2 1/2 years old when we adopted her- at the end of a normal rat life span), since we had decided as a family that we were no longer going to have rats, since they don't live very long and leave holes in our hearts with every death. But Mom insisted, so Macy came home with us.

Macy wasn't social with the other rats, but she loved us. She loved to be cuddled, explore, and eat people food. Macy liked going to the vet, and at the vet's, everyone loved her. Macy's charm and adorable looks helped her scam lunches off of the vet staff- who would keep her longer so they could play.

Macy was arguably the cutest rat we've ever had; she was a blue-hooded rat with dumbo ears and a cateract in her right eye. She was indiscriminately affectionate, and so loved. We celebrate having been able to cherish her for the time that we had her.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Better baby dreams

The other night I had a dream that I had a baby. And that I was an actress. And that I was living in the dorm at Mills again. Strange stuff.

It was a handsome little boy, no name. Blue-green eyes, chubby arms and legs. He was very good natured, liked to be held. Good thing: I had no inclination to kill this child.

Went to Yoshi's last night, Arturo Sandoval was supposed to be there, but the hurricane kept him stranded in Miami until tonight's 10PM show. I had tekka maki and tempura last night. And this morning, I had food poisoning. Sonofabitch.

I had to send Andrew to work to pick up my notes so that I could continue working on the website between running to the bathroom to greet last night's dinner. Hopefully working on the website at home will count as telecommuting and they won't try to hose me out of one of my five sick days per year. Because I certainly DID work on the website.

It was a yucky day. I didn't get around to brushing my teeth until 3PM. Sat around in my pjs all day, working on the website until I got tired, then went and laid down again.

I enjoy commentary by the writers of television shows. Andrew and I started watching the CSI's with the commentary on after we watched the episodes for the first time. Unfortunately, the actors aren't nearly as smart as the characters they play, which is disappointing on a number of levels. I know they're actors but it's easier to think that people are somewhat like the characters they play. At least for me.

I'm looking forward to this weekend, Halloween in my Christmas. I have two costumes, pictures to be posted once they're, you know, taken.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Nightmares

I had some really bad nightmares the other night, one of which was that I was being chased by the Reevers (sp?) from Serenity. The other was that I had an infant that was scary looking.

Not just scary, but downright evil. Like Chucky. Nobody else seemed to notice that the baby was scary looking or evil. The whole time I thought, "I can't raise this child. I'm scared of it." And the overwhelming desire to just kill it quietly.

Scary. It's probably an omen of being a bad mother in the future. Just thought I would share.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Red Lipstick

For those of you who know what Red Lipstick is, I finished it, and now it's in the polishing stages.

I haven't been doing much knitting, but I've been making beaded stitch markers wildly. Beads are fun. So far I've done a set of pearl/garnet ones (that are GORGEOUS), and bought beads for some other ones. They are soooo pretty, and fun to make. Soothing for the brain.

In other fun stuff, Ally is going to be home for the weekend!!!

I'm currently reading The Inner Circle which is a fictitious (or semi-fictitious) account of one of the guys involved in the Kinsey experiments. Good writing. Not sure if I like it.

Thursday, October 6, 2005

Woo! Yarn!

So, I got home for lunch yesterday, and there were two small packages waiting for me. One was the Watermelon Yarn as well as her Gryffindor colorway, AND my Yarn of the Month for October. I had to cast on my Watermelon immediately, and it is SOOOO cool.

I'm excited; Ally is coming home next weekend, and it's going to be freaking great!

Gil Grissom from CSI is hot. *lecherous laugh* Just so you know. Three cheers for crushes on fictitious characters. I love nerds. Woo!

Wednesday, October 5, 2005

Woo for responsibility (and Blogging)

I was recently handed a project that requires some coding. Well, I don't know any code, but it seems that the website for work uses the same style of coding that Blogdrive does.

Well, the point is that I looked really smart when the tech guy showed me how to do it the first time and I said, "Oh! I've done this before."

We'll see how this project goes. Look out internet, I'm official now!

Monday, October 3, 2005

Cashmere... ooooh

On Thursday, Mom went to Costco to purchase Diana Gabaldon's new book, A Breath of Snow and Ashes, which they had for $15.

While she was there, Mom found cashmere turtleneck sweaters for $60 each. She called me and asked what colors I wanted, so she listed off what they had, and I got all of them. These are great sweaters, all in colors that look great on me. There is slight shaping, but they are super awesome.

In the UFO bin was Katie's scarf. Katie is the greatest real estate agent EVER. Seriously. So that's live and going now, after it's brief hiatus in the UFO bin while we moved. Teal cashmere.... ooooh.

CORRUPTING THE YOUTH OF AMERICA

Last night I taught my niece Hannah how to knit. She had gone to a birthday party, and the goodie bag had needles and yarn, and she was DYING to learn to knit. She called our house at 8AM on Saturday morning and expressed her interest in starting right away, so we established that she had fuzzy yarn and regular needles. We decided that Sunday was a better day to learn, since she had soccer during the day and we had Grace's birthday dinner.

I get there, only to realize that they had given her size 4 (US) needles and fuzzy yarn (which I had brought some nice, plain, Cascade 220 for her to get started on.

What kind of idiot starts beginners on size 4 needles? Even moreso- what kind of idiot starts a child on needles that won't show ANY progress?! Needless to say, I put Hannah on a set of my circulars, and we learned. Next week, she gets her very own grown-up needles and can fly on her own.

More TV on DVD to knit by

Carnivale- a show for people who enjoy the battle between good and evil- even when you're not sure who is on which side. There are tons of literary allusions, and the writing is above mainstream audiences. There are only 2 or 3 seasons, but the first one was very strong, and I'm eagerly awaiting the second.

I delivered one of my finishing projects yesterday (I don't list those b/c I'm not doing the hard part- the knitting), and she was thrilled. Woo!

Friday, September 30, 2005

TV on DVD to knit by

At the request of my aunt, I am posting a list of my favorite TV shows to knit by. I don't watch a whole lot of live TV anymore, since I hate commercials, and Netflix makes it nice and easy to live commercial free. Relatively.

Awesome shows

The West Wing. I've only seen the first four seasons, but the writing is just great. Even though Leo McGarry is a racist asshole, the rest of the senior staff is brilliant and GORGEOUS. I really like how they made President Bartlett super smart. I like his style.

Dead Like Me - A little gory, but good. The premise is that the main character is killed by a toilet seat falling from a Russian space station, and she becomes a grim reaper. It's kind of dark, but funny. Not ok for young audiences.

Law & Order- It's violent, it's dark, but they catch the bad guys most of the time, and there are bunches of Broadway actor cameos- especially in SVU. Not kid-friendly.

CSI: Crime Scene Investigation- Las Vegas, the original series. Good story, terrible dialog, but William Petersen is soooo hot.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Excellent Customer Service

People have been discussing the Summer 2005 issue of Interweave Knits, when I realized that it's practically Fall, and I still haven't gotten my summer issue.

Hmmmm.... I think to myself, and hit their website to get the "subscriptions" line.

A young woman named Jen answered the phone and had the issue dealt with in under a minute. She was completely charming about it, and I could hear her actually smiling (not fake smiling) on the phone. Yes, I really can hear the difference.

Until I called, I was more than a little upset that two issues had been skipped, and I had problems getting the FIRST issue after I subscribed. I thought, "Why on earth am I giving these people my money?"

Good customer service goes a long way with me. Why can't everyone be so pleasant?

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

FO- Baby Einstein

I finished the seams on the baby Einstein, and sewed on the buttons. Now it's in the FO bin, waiting for a baby.

I detested making it, the whole thing being in garter stitch and all, but it sooooooooooooo freaking cute.

I'm still working through Memoirs of a Geisha, still enjoying it.

Pics to be posted when I find and figure out how to set up the digital camera with my laptop. Woo!

Sunday, September 25, 2005

FO! Andrew socks!

I finished a pair of Andrew's socks that I started when I was in South Dakota during summer '04.

I really will post photos, I just need to get Andrew to take them when there is good light and my feet are feeling photogenic.

To continue on my finishing kick, I'm going to seam up the Baby Einstein fromThe Knit Stitch I have on my desk that has been haunting me since... March?

Mom, Cynthia and I went to the sale at a local knitting shop, and I bought NOTHING!!! Such self-control. Then we drove to Redwood City to pick up sock yarn from a gal who I bought it from on Ebay (shipping would have cost twice what gas did, without a fraction of the adventure).

Woo for de-stashing and FINISHING!

The way I do socks is bind one off, cast one on, so I've starte the Regia "India" in the Jubilee series.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Finding FO's

I was digging around, looking for my copy of Ponchos & Wraps- a Knitter's dozen and I found a pair of socks that I finished knitting last school year, but didn't have the ends woven in yet, and a pair where one was in a knitting bag and the other was in the "lonely sock" bag (where single socks go to meet their mates). Woo! That's two more pairs off the needles and in the drawer.

I've been on a general finishing kick lately, finishing old projects, and finishing books that I want to get off of my bookshelf. I'm not really a collector of general fiction; some books are just a one-time read for me. I have fiction that I'm still attached to, like the Anita Blake series, and the Diana Gabaldon Jaime & Claire series. Lord John's book was good, too, but ultimately not a favorite.

I've finished House of Sand & Fog, Caucasia, and I'm working on Memoirs of a Geisha.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Digging in the UFO basket

So, last night I thought to myself, "I know that I have more than one pair of fingering weight socks on the needles." So I went into the garage, where the UFO basket and bins are.

For those of you who are curious, the UFO basket is the one that I'm trying to empty in order to transition WIPs that have been "timed out" out of bins and into the basket. Eventually, all projects should get finished this way. In theory. If only theory applied to my knitting whims.

I came across two pairs of socks that were more than half done that I started in South Dakota last summer, for Andrew. Just FYI, I got razzed at XRX about knitting socks, but by the end of summer, most of the people who razzed me were knitting socks. Muah ah ah.

They're both Regia socks, and both are from the Braid Box closing sale (less than $2/ball). I've been on a finishing kick lately- mostly to free my needles for other projects, and absolve my knitting soul for needless but AWESOME purchases.

I will also be finishing a pair of charity baby sockies made of Fancy Image Yarns Superwash Merino so that I can free those needles up to knit Constance's birthday socks out of this month's Yarn of the Month from Fancy Image.

I really like my little project progress monitors, and it looks like the percentage bars aren't up and running. So this is it for now as far as blog changes are concerned.

ETA for the Watermelon and Hogwarts yarn is about 2 weeks. Woo!

Monday, September 19, 2005

FO! Socks!

I just finished my "Spanish Moss" Cherry Tree Hill socks. Woo!

Review- Astrid's Dutch Obsessions Order

I placed an order on Ebay to "Astrid's Dutch Obsessions" for 8 balls of Opal Sock Yarn, six in the "Rainforest" collection, and two of the Rodeo collection. I placed the order on September 3rd (a Saturday).

It was shipped on the less expensive speed, and arrived on September 13th (six business days). I found this to be particularly speedy, considering that it was the slower speed as well as being sent from New Zealand. The yarn is GORGEOUS and had no odor or issue.

Including shipping, I paid about $10.50 US for each ball, making it 1/3 less expensive than buying it in a store in the US. It's not the shopowners' fault that it's way more expensive here; the US distributor is gouging them, riding the profit wave that is Opal. I think this is a bad idea on the part of the distributor, especially with the internet to offer us international sellers.

I also really like that she sent me an e-mail shortly after my payment went through saying "The package is ready to go out first thing Monday." I like to know that the seller has received payment and isn't sitting on my order.

I give Astrid's Dutch Obsessions my highest recommendations, and will order from her again, once I've destashed enough to justify another sock yarn order. *grin*

Happy International Speak Like A Pirate Day!

Friday, September 16, 2005

Jubilee socks, pair #2

Here is the colorway of the socks that I started last night Greenland.

Last night, Cynthia and Mom came over and we hung out and knitted. It was fun. We also had a "Top 5" Buffy discussion, which was fun.

Plans for the weekend include attending Ren Faire at Casa de Fruta. Arr, it be pirate weekend!

Thursday, September 15, 2005

FO! Socks!

I finished the W.I.P. Jubilee Socks last night (picture to be posted soon), and part of yesterday's excitement was e-mailing back and forth with Dani about Watermelon Yarn! . My special request was to make it superwash, so we've been e-mailing back and forth to make it happen!


The colorway I used is called "Oslo"

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

A shift in focus

I've decided that I'm going to be true to the name of the blog and blog about my knitting, since there is not much else going on. Work is always the same (usually), so I'll be posting pics of Works In Progress (WIPs) and Finished Objects (FOs).

I just finished reading She's Come Undone by Wally Lamb, and it was okay. It was good writing, but so very sad and so very L-O-N-G. I'm finishing House of Sand and Fog, even though I know it turns out badly for the Persian family. I just want them off of my bookshelf, not half-read, being a book-cancer.

Knitting News and Reviews

I've hit a finishing kick, I've finished 2 ribbon tops, and like 4 pairs of socks in the last month. I also de-stashed a bit (a la Cynthia), and orded some of the new Opal Rainforest series . Although I ordered one ball of this from Yarnzilla and the rest on Ebay (total cost per ball on ebay including shipping= $10.50), I found Yarnzilla to be quick and well worth their flat $5 shipping.

I ordered the Opal on Ebay instead for the most part because I don't like the business practices of the US distributor. She tells retailors to mark up the yarn to $15/skein , when she's selling it to them at $11/skein. The gal I ordered mine from is from New Zealand Astrid's Dutch Obsessions(review upon reciept of the yarn), thus sidestepping said evil distributor.

I am currently actively working on some socks made from "Honeymoon Yarn"- stuff I bought in Seattle. I'll post the photos Andrew took of my Seattle haul in the hotel. It covered the bed, wait till you see!

Specifically, the yarn I'm using is the Regia Jubilee Series because Cynthia wanted to buy a bunch of it, and I use less than half of the ball. I also paid like $6.50/ball for it, because the yarn store I got it at catered to scarf knitters, rather than long-term knitters. I also got 10 or 15% off because of the amount that I purchased. It's super popular now, from what I understand from the knitting buzz.

In other news, Elphie attempted knitting socks yesterday while I wasn't home. From the looks of things, she got frustrated with her lack of opposable thumbs, and tangled four balls of sock yarn around the living room. She takes after her mother, braving heights to get at yarn; she climbed up on the CAL chair, and yanked it off of the bookshelf.

More later, and hopefully photos!

Thursday, September 1, 2005

Audrie II

Audrie II had to be put to sleep today. She had respiratory problems, recovering bumblefoot in both back feet, and was beginning to lose her fur. She just wasn't happy anymore. Audrie was 2 1/2 years old, fairly old for a rat.

She had a rough beginning in life; she was involved in a cruelty case where a man had 80 cages in a one-bedroom apartment, all full of pet rats. He was breeding them and trying to sell them, from what I was told.

Rattieratz rescue had her at their adoption fair, and Audrie picked Sam. We brought her home, and found that her gift was that of projectile pooping. While we were trying to find a name for her, I came up with "#2" (like from Austin Powers), but Sam said that you can't give a number name, so we came up with "Audrie II" (from "Little Shop of Horrors"). Audrie and Topaz were great friends, and I think it was hardest on Audrie when Topaz passed away.

Audrie was a more selective rat; she didn't want to play all of the time, but would let you know when she did. She was a sweet rat when she wanted to be, and man, did she have spunk and a peanut-gut. We all loved her very much.

Wednesday, August 3, 2005

Foot-in-Mouth Disease

Sometimes people say things intending to express themselves, and just manage to insult you unintentionally. Case in point:

Andrew and I ran into Sam (not my brother, the guy who works at the ethnic food store we shop at) and his drop-dead gorgeous wife. Later that evening, Andrew says to me, "Wow, if I were married to someone that hot, I would be worried about her cheating on me all the time."

Now, to most people who own functional ears this implies that I am rather homely, and thus, safe from the interests of other men. Not a nice thing to say to someone who sleeps next to you every night.

Being me, instead of sucking it up and thinking "Gosh, I am not pretty," I point out that he is calling me homely by making such an assessment, to which he argues that implying my homliness was not his intention.

I'm in touch with reality. I know that I'm not a super-model. Mine is not the face that launched a thousand ships. But I'm not exactly homely, either.

Just thought I would share with all the rest of you, homely and super-models alike.

I'm totally bailing on this post to go and finish Gone With the Nerd (to be reviewed upon completion and contemplation of plot, writing style, and nerd hotness factor).

Saturday, July 16, 2005

Literacy and reading

There was this post on Knitflame stating a statistic that said that less than half of the Americans polled had read a book in the last year, where in Canada it was less than 20% that hadn't read a book in the last year.

So what does this mean? As an enthusiastic bibliophile, it's distressing but not altogether shocking. Watching TV is easier than picking a book and sticking to it, I suppose. I also know people who use their bookshelves for storing knick-knacks and other similar kitschy crap (ugh). I've known people who needed prodding to read, but got hooked on a series once they did (woo! I converted one!).

I'll have to admit that majoring in Lit cut down on my personal time for reading, but I did get to read many of the books that were on my "to read" list. Working full-time on a computer cuts down on it too; by the time I get home, my eyes have been fatigued by the screen too long to incite the desire to read (although I'm currently working on "Fat, White Vampire Blues" upstairs and "She's Come Undone" downstairs. I've read a bunch of romance novels, but don't count them as books.

With the onset of the internet, I think people are doing more reading than before. The existence of blogs- something somewhat personal that everyone can read- makes it so one would assume that people are reading more through the neccessity of having to do so online. I read the first 13 chapters of Pride and Prejudice online; I'm also reading the Court TV bits about various serial killers. Blogs, MySpace, Friendster, all of those require reading. Does it contribute or detract from literacy? What about forums and chats?

Although I can blame the decline of spelling and complete sentences on chats and forums, I have to admit that people are reading them, and that's the point, right?

Ok, off to watch my Saturday morning cartoons.

Saturday, July 2, 2005

Long time no blog

This has to be quick, since I have a ton of stuff to get done.

The new job is great, they like me alot and they're pretty cool people. I'm doing some interesting, some not-so interesting stuff. Variety is the spice of life, right?

Mom's got people in her house; crazy relatives along with Kathy- everyone in Kathy's entourage is making Mom nuts, and vice versa. The extended family are bastards, but I have to play nice.

I went to the Concord show, ran into Zak's family; Zak and I are on speaking terms again, which is good. That makes me 4 for 4 (I'm on good terms with all ex's + current). Today is Pacific Procession, I'm only going to warmups.

Elphie is getting closer to potty trained, which is good. We're getting an anti-bark system today (it seems they bark basically all day until we get home). Nothing mean, but positive re-inforcement doesn't seem to work in this case when we're not home.

The new bed is awesome, I've never slept so well in my life. Well, except for the couple of days after I got my wisdom teeth pulled. Ok, the best non-drug-induced sleep of my life.

Time to shower and get my day kick-started. I promise to blog more often, A. I do so hate to disappoint.

I have an upcoming blog on literacy. It should be cool. Maybe.

Wednesday, June 8, 2005

Woo! Moved in and props!

We're moved in to the new house, thanks to all of our great friends. We couldn't have done it without y'all!

We're in the new house, I interviewed for a great job yesterday, and was offered it formally this morning. I start on Monday.

Niki and the new puppy (Elphie) are getting along fairly well, there is some dominance stuff going on, but it's getting better.

We get our bed tomorrow (woo!). Now I have to go and unpack boxes so that we can be comfortable again.

Swing on by if you get a chance. The place is fairly awesome.

The housewarming/graduation party is Friday night, let me know if you can come, otherwise... I'm calling EVERYONE. One by one by one.

Seriously guys, we couldn't have done it without you. Sandwiches alone cannot express our gratitude.

Saturday, May 28, 2005

"Nice cookies."

I've had hellish allergies since Wednesday; I woke up and thought I had the flu. My head was congested, I was sneezing all over the place, and I had a terrible hacking cough. The only thing was that my body didn't ache; the misery was confined to my head.

I've never really had allergy issues in California; even when I was in South Dakota, I lost my voice and sneezed (sinus issues). That was easily resolved with the Allegra that Andrew had the foresight to pack for me.

Ok, so what? I take a Benadryl, and still can't sleep. This has NEVER happened to me before. Benadryl knocks me flat normally. I tried Allegra, and there was slight relief, but still misery. At Grace's suggestion, I try Claritin, which TOTALLY worked. I'm feeling almost completely better, but still coughing.

There is a point to this, really, stay with me. We had a day of errands, which included meeting the people who sold us their house. When you're feeling really crappy but need to make a good impression, what do you do? Wear something modest and makeup so that you don't look like the corpse that you feel like.

One of our errands was to drop off Cynthia's Aussie cookies (which are AWESOME, they have them at Starbucks, but sell them for way less at Costco), but she was at Baycon. No big, I wasn't planning to go, and with the way I was feeling it was a definite no-go. Last year, I decided that since I did not get my Gopher refund (which I was told that I would, but whatever), I refuse to pay to be ogled by desperate and horny men with no regular personal hygiene schedule. I know, picky, picky. Pesky standards.

As i walk into the lobby of the Doubletree, some fool says to me (while looking at my chest), "Nice cookies."

Ah yes, this is why I decided not to come, I think to myself, delivering the cookies to Cynthia and seeing David and Jason along the way, and slogging my way back to the car.

We met the family that we bought the house from (they were super-nice), and they liked us. Woo for good impressions! They might be out early (moved Thursday and Friday), so they said that they'd let us know if we could get in early (which would be AWESOME).

Plan for tonight? Bonfire at the Shanty, in the backyard (we have a fire pit and backyard available).

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

More than just a vacuum

Since I've been married, what has been considered exciting has shifted considerably. Andrew and I had a very exciting evening planned: we were going to buy our vacuum cleaner. Our first; a Dyson 14 with the animal hair attachment.

We had seen the Dyson at Bed, Bath and Beyond (at a competitive price). All of our friends and family began looking frantically for the coupon that they send out every few weeks, promising 20% off of one, regularly-priced item.

I'm chatting with Joey on AIM, and Joey finds his coupon. Woo! Vacuum for 20% off! (Which came to about $110 in savings.) To thank Joey, I asked him what he wants for dinner, and he says "A Polish sausage from Costco." The guy saves us $110 bucks and wants a $1.50 sausage?

"Are you sure?" I ask, to which he replies "Yes."

We walk over to the Costco window, which is shutting down and they're no longer serving.

"Do you want to go to Happy Hound?" I ask, then we drive to Happy Hound, which had closed 5 minutes before.

"How about KFC?" ding-ding-ding! We had a winner! Finally a place that was open and acceptable. We had a great time, and made sure to thank Joey profusely. Not exciting, but we were pretty happy.

Savings on a vacuum: $110
Dinner at KFC: $14
Running around looking for food after 9PM in order to thank a friend: Priceless.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Front-loading versus top loading washers

Since we're moving into a new house, even though we got the washer/dryer with it, I want to get a new one. Now, for most people a washer is a washer is a washer. Not so; knitting my own sweaters (that are handwash only), I need a few more options. It's especially convenient because when I finish pieces for other people, then often require washing and blocking.

So, Andrew and I looked at washers and dryers and found some rather interesting information. Front loading washers last as long as dryers.

Which brings me to this observation: Have you noticed that houses tend to have new-ish washers and ancient dryers? My parents still have the original dryer that came with the house that we moved into in 1988. Who knows how old the thing is (although, it is 60's green).

More later, the puppy moves in June 12th. We're thinking Lucy for the name.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Moving into the new house, and graduation/housewarming party!

Hey all!

We are officially moving into our new place on June 4th; come one come all to haul and help. Foodage will be provided, so long as orders are in before then. There will be a refreshment/heckling/morale team, consisting of myself and anyone else who is prohibited by health from moving boxes. It's going to be good times. E-mail me your requests, and reserve your spot for this fun-tastic event today!

I'm graduating on Saturday, Andrew is graduating next Thursday, so we're throwing a dual graduation/housewarming potluck party on Friday the 10th of June from 7PM until the wee hours (or when y'all get tired). Please bring a dish or beverage to share as we will be providing some pretty fantastic cake. If you don't have our new address, please send me an e-mail and I'll get it to you.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Puppy!

This is the puppy, for your enjoyment. Any and all suggestions on names would be appreciated.